The College Try

When I first went to Brew Co.'s open mic on the tenth the host plugged the next week's show as one without ironic racism.  The next night, he maligned the comedy cliche again and this time I applauded.  I was the only one.  He mocked me with a seemingly hypocritical slur, "Thank you Eric Cheung, the self-loathing chink."

 

To which I cheerfully responded, "I hate myself, but it has nothing to do with being Chinese!"  I suppose we were both using irony and exaggeration for comic effect.  I also suppose that I might have felt extra sarcastic after getting the distinct impression that I was making people feel weird when I was on stage.

 

So, it surprised me when, after the open mic at IO West on Sunday (a show that I didn't get on again, although I did meet the regular host after for the first time, Sam Saifer hosted for the last time until she returns from a tour.  In addition, although I was there in time, I didn't watch the Imrov Jam), he offered me a ride home as I walked down Vine towards the bus stop.  He commented that the neighborhood was more suitable and up-and-coming, despite what others had said.

 

The next night I went back to the Amsterdam Cafe, since Ireland's 32 was no longer doing a show (I had witnessed an Irish wake for the show the week before).  I got there to find more familiar faces than I had seen the last time I was there.  Others thought as I did.  But there was a show at Ireland's.  The show at Amsterdam Cafe is now at 7:30 or 8ish, and the Ireland's show is at 9:30.  That show features longer sets, comics get to do eight minutes.  I hung out with my friends as one of them headed over to Ireland's to sign some of us up.  I didn't bother because I was already at a show and to do both seemed a little complicated, especially since I signed up for a late spot.

 

The host continued his phony introductions that were usually hyperbolically complimentary riffs off of a joke from the previous comment followed by reading the name off of the list.  When I've hosted in the past I've been careful not to lie.  If somebody's not funny, I say something else that's nice or good about them.  There's usually something.

 

I got up and got the light after a couple of minutes.  Most of this week I've been doing material that includes the wisdom teeth story and most of the new jokes that I've written since moving out here.  I've been attempting to go through some of the rest of my jokes that I've written over the years slowly, to demonstrate my awesome writing (now who's hyperbolic?).

 

I may try to hit Ireland's from now on, to get the longer sets, but next Monday I'll go to the Upright Citizen's Brigade to do their monthly open mic.

 

Tuesday afternoon I went to Westwood to browse the neighborhood, apply for jobs, and do the open mic at night.  Before I left I got a call for a possible job, but it was at a clothing store on Melrose, so it was one that may have conflicting hours, so I decided to continue the search in hopes of finding something more compatible.

 

First I went to the West Coast version of Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash.  It's like the comic book and memorabilia section of Newbury Comics, a Boston record shop chain, but geekier and with a naturally heavy focus on Kevin Smith films, including some artifacts from the films.  To me that would be an interesting place to work, so I asked.  "No, not right now."

 

Elsewhere in the neighborhood were movie theatres.  They usually showcased one film in one theatre per cinema.  Another quirk in the neighborhood is a series of round disks on the sidewalks not unlike the Walk of Fame branching out of the intersection of Hollywood and Vine.  They list the Academy Award winners for Best Picture for each year.  I followed them looking for the first winner, "Wings" from 1927, but my search led me, instead, up stairs to the Kaplan Testing Center offices (I was very close to UCLA's campus.  I grabbed my book bag with resumes in it and walked in asking if they were hiring.

 

"Like for admin work, or to teach?"  To teach?  Well, just the day before I considered what I would do if I was a complete failure in the entertainment industry.  I never really gave it much thought.  I never thought of a career outside of a creative field (There are a few exceptions.  When I was about three or four I was asked this question after a day out with my dad and since I had been playing I decided "Monkey Bar climber!"  My first two loves were drawing and bowling, and in high school I was fascinated with psychology.  I knew I wasn't particularly good at research beyond the trivial, so the things that have carried me through it all were art, writing, and pop culture, especially television).  I thought to myself that there may come a time to admit defeat, so I thought that a career I'd be interested in would be an English teacher of some kind, whether it be in a high school or a college.  Maybe I'd write some books and advise a drama club on the side.  This would mean I'd need to go back to school and get a Master's Degree, but if I could get some experience, that would help me see if I like it.

 

"Here are two business cards.  One for these offices and another for the person in charge of recruiting teachers.  You can email her a resume," the woman behind the desk told me.

 

I dropped off a resume and walked outside.  I saw a woman standing outside an elevator.  "Where's the Best Picture for 1950?  I can't find it." 

 

"I don't know I just work here," leading me to wonder why someone so familiar with the building wouldn't know something like that.

 

"Are they hiring at any of the companies in this building?  I was just in there," I pointed behind me at the Kaplan window, "and I asked if there was any need for some admin help or teachers."

 

"Did they give you a card with the name," she mentioned a name, "on it?"  I looked at the card.  Yes it did.  "That's me.  Do you have any experience?"  She looked at me and read me well, "Let me guess--no,"  You know what, send me a resume."  I offered to give her one I had in my folder, but she said she was headed home.  I realized I had teaching experience, just not in the classroom.  I would email a cover letter explaining as much mindful of the fact that I'd include my grammatical pet-peeves and quirks.  I'm of the belief that having a passionate dislike for something very specific within a field demonstrates an intimate knowledge, and love, of that field.  So refrain from the passive voice in my presence.

 

I went to UCLA to ask if there were any openings there, but I was hungry.  I happened to pass an In-N-Out Burger, something that would be delightful news to some of my East Coast friends who asked me to look for the famous regional chain (I've noticed that California loves its burger joints and they love their cars.  It doesn't matter if either is new or old in style, they're passionate about them.  In fact it's these arguments that demonstrate that passion).

 

I decided instead that I was in the mood for some Asian food instead, so I went to a place called Mongol King and it was a fast food joint, but it was absolutely delicious.

 

I went to the show at Brew Co. and discovered that the show was being taped for an adult cable channel in Boulder, Colorado called TEN.  The room is an upstairs room with a lot of natural wood and bright, if non-theatrical lighting, so it seemed an odd choice.  Only the scheduled comics would be taped, save for any one else that wanted to sign a release and deliver their bluest material.

 

So, naturally, I was exempt.  I went on late, as usual, but felt proud that I'd written what I consider to be an incredible joke that day.  In fact, each time I've told it so far, I've had to stop myself from laughing.

 

The next night I got to Synergy Cafe a little late, but I made the cutoff for comics to perform on Sean Patton's show.  By the time I got on, several comics had gone over their time, so I said, "Don't worry, I'm doing a tight three," which is becoming increasingly harder to do because I keep feeling like I have more and more good, solid material.  But I did it and had fun.

 

I also noticed that a comic I'd seen on Dan Rosenberg's Comedy District two weeks earlier had done a punchline I gave him.  This guy was a headliner using a line I'd written for him, so I felt pretty good and talked to him about it.  He thanked me.

 

Speaking of the Comedy District, like the night before the show was taken over by outside forces.  This time it was a stand-up classes graduation.  The comics were, of course, a mixed bag, but no more so than a typical open mic.

 

I wanted to go to the Sabor Cafe, and then maybe the Fake Gallery.  I had emailed Rich about getting on the Sabor Cafe show earlier that week, but I hadn't heard back from him, so I assumed it wasn't early enough.  But I'd go because I thought I'd drop off a blank DVD onto which my set from last time could be recorded.

 

The guy that tapes sets wasn't there on Thursday either.  But I stuck around because Rich said that he might be able to get me on.  I figured it'd be my best bet at stage time without going all the way to Santa Monica (even if I had a car I don't think I'd want to make the trek).

 

The setup was different from the last time because the cafe was preparing for Halloween.  The comics faced the window instead of the audience.  I enjoyed watching my friends try stuff out, but fandom of another kind clashed with the show.

 

Someone accidentally told a comic what the score of the Mets/Cardinals game was to the chagrin of the comic.  He had taped the game and didn't want anyone to tell him how his home team from Shea Stadium had fared.  He yelled at the guy interrupting an especially quiet open miker on stage.

 

Later on, Sean Patton cleverly made reference to this by opening his set with a warning, "Last night 'Lost' was on and I taped it, so nobody tell me what happened!"

 

A couple of other comics were debating whether or not to go to the Fake Gallery or to head over to Santa Monica for the Unurban Cafe and Sean Pearlman asked me if I wanted them to sign me up for a spot there.  I declined.

 

I followed the same routine I did the previous Friday.  I got to Groundworks a little late signing up for a spot late in the show and then walked to the Black Box Theatre a little early and hung out before doing a set at that show.  The show would be without a microphone that worked (there was one, but it wasn't connected to the amplifier, only to the mic stand).  The best way to describe the room is that it looks a little like a classroom with a black pie-shaped stage jutting from one corner, a dark blue color scheme, and fluorescent lights.  In the wall sits a window, presumably for puppet shows.

 

My first set, at the Black Box, didn't go particularly well.  Actually, it may be that the previous week's good set was something of a fluke considering that the show is held in front of all comics with no effort to be anything other than a show for comics.  I was however the first set without any significant laughter.  Maybe I shouldn't have been the first one to use the non-working microphone.

 

But it was still the opposite of the previous week, in that I did better at Groundworks than I did at the Black Box.  Then I did my usual and went back to the Black Box on the first floor for some free pizza, soda, and improv (my priorities are listed in order, but I don't want to be rude so I stay for some improv and usually enjoy it).

 

I noticed that the teams developed decidedly longer scenes, and focused more on character development, than I'd seen, even on this show.  I liked it because the comedy came, organically, from the characters.

 

Outside I saw one of my classmates from Emerson College, James Kirkland.  He was in the most popular troupe on campus at the time "Jimmy's Traveling All-Stars."  We caught up and he wholeheartedly endorsed Improv Olympic as an improv school.  I'd usually heard better things about Upright Citizen's Brigade than IO West, so I'll have to do more research before deciding upon a school to go to.

 

Tomorrow I'll likely go to IO West for their open mic, Monday I'll probably go to the UCB for theirs, Tuesday Westwood Brewing Co. aka Brew Co., Wednesday Synergy, Thursday either the Fake Gallery or Unurban, Friday probably both Groundworks and Black Box, and Saturday I'll be performing my first booked gig at The Tomorrow Show at the Steven Allen Theater (see below).

 

Thank you, I'm Eric Cheung.  I'm on MySpace and Live Journal.

 

Upcoming gigs

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October 28th: Saturday Midnight. "The Tomorrow Show." The Steve Allen Theater.  $5.